Transform your Sex Life!
This exercise might look simple but it is very powerful and fun
to do. For more information please go to my site
www.bodyecstatic.com
This exercise takes about an hour, so make sure you put aside
enough time. Start by preparing your space. You'll be naked, so
put the heating on at least an hour before so you'll be warm
enough. Make sure you won't be disturbed. Unplug the phone and
lock your door. After you have done stage one you can do the
nest stage another day.
Before you start, it's important that you both agree this isn't
a prelude to sex and genital touching is out of bounds for stage
1 and stage 2. You may find you become aroused during the
exercise, but this isn't the aim. Take it in turns to be the
touched and the toucher.
The receiver.
You just need to lend your partner your body for 30 minutes: 15
minutes lying on your front, then 15 on your back. You don't
need to say anything unless something's uncomfortable.
The giver.
You focus your attention as much as possible on your sensations.
Direct all your attention and intention on where you touch your
partners skin and where your partner touches you when you swap
places.
If you mind wanders during the exercise consciously bring it
back to the places of your connection and what you are
experiencing. If you start to try to please your partner just
bring your focus on your touch.
This type of healing touch is Very slow. Practice slowing your
speed of touch by half. Pressure free with no goal at all.
Focused on pleasure of touching your partner, not giving
pleasure. In the here and now. Bring your mind back to your
touch if you drift off.
Explore your partner's body from head to toe, first the back
then the front. Avoid the genital area. Focus totally on your
sensations of touch. Think about the different textures and
temperatures of your partner's body. Think about how it feels to
use hard and soft, long and short strokes.
Use your fingertips, palms and the back of your hands. A touch
that just touches the hairs of the skin can be very pleasurable.
Also, go very slow in moving your hands and this helps you be
more present and out of your head.
Also scan your body time to time. You could be surprised at
feelings of energy in your body as you touch. Remember - this
isn't a massage. The point is to focus on the pleasure of
touching your partner, not giving pleasure. You can do that
another day.
When you've finished swap over.
It is important both partners take turns. If one partner does
not want to swap this could mean some relationship issues you
both need to address. After the hour's up, don't analyze it
straight away. In fact, agree that you won't talk about it for
24 hours. This will help you focus on the sensory experience,
rather than rationalizing the process.
The second stage allows partners to touch any part of the
other's body, including the genitals and breasts. However, the
focus remains the same-on the sensation of touching, not on
sexual response. Intercourse is not allowed. Again the focused
is on pleasure of touching your partner, not giving pleasure.
The third step involves mutual touching, eventually leading to
sexual intercourse as the couple becomes more comfortable with
the pleasure of the here and now of touching and being touched.
The focus is on enjoyment rather than on orgasm. One can next
add more communication to the exercise. Explore what parts of
your lovers body is most sensitive. Ask for feedback to map your
partners erotic zones. My tip. Try sucking the big toe! When you
have sucked one try both at once! After you do the exercise, ask
yourself did you feel more comfortable in the giving role or the
receiving role? How much of the time were you totally present in
your touch?