Escaping Domestic Violence
On the 25th November 2001 Penny Beale was brutally murdered. The
victim of domestic violence, she was punched, kicked and stamped
on by her partner. She received 123 injuries including 18 broken
ribs, her liver, spleen and lungs were pierced. Penny was 31
years old.
Penny's story was not unique, it followed a pattern that is
repeated daily world-wide. On average 3 women a day are killed
in the US by their partners and the crime covers all social
classes. As a result of Penny's death her mother set up a
Memorial Fund dedicated to providing advice and support to
victims of domestic violence.
One of the biggest difficulties facing an abused woman is
having the courage to escape from the violence. Many feel
trapped believing they have nowhere to go. Verbal well as
physical violence has destroyed self confidence. Many have lost
contact with their family because the abuser has prevented it.
Often there are children involved causing additional worries
about coping. However there is help available. Many women flee
their house on the spur of the moment, when their life is in
danger this is often their only option. But if you are thinking
of leaving and can plan in advance, it will make sorting your
life out afterwards a lot easier as well as protecting you and
any children.
Don't wait until you are being attacked, make plans in advance
and leave when it is safe. Pack a small suitcase with essential
clothes. If you can, leave it with a friend where it won't
found. Take your children with you if possible and talk to a
lawyer about custody. Take all important documents such as birth
certificates, passports, bank details etc. Take any prescription
medicines you or your children need. Take spare house keys. If
you need to return to your home ask the police to accompany you.
If you have any evidence of abuse, e.g. photographs, take them
with you.
If you have a mobile, make sure it is charged. Have a small
emergency fund for fares or phone calls.
If you think you or your children are in danger, dial the
emergency number.
Try to get some advice from one of the agencies listed on the
Penny Beale Memorial Fund website or in your local telephone
book. They will give you information about housing, benefits and
support. Most law firms have a partner who specialises in family
law.
Once you have left, do not arrange to meet your abuser alone
however sincere their remorse appears.
This article has discussed violence towards women, but men can
also be victims, either of a woman or in a same sex relationship.
Everyone's circumstances are different, professional advice
should always be sought and no liability is accepted by the
author of this article for actions taken by victims.
This article was written to support the Penny Beale
Memorial Fund - Action Against Domestic Violence a
charitable organisation dedicated to advising and supporting
victims of domestic violence. Please visit the site.
Professional advice should always be sought and no liability is
accepted.