Embracing The Late Wife

EMBRACING THE LATE WIFE In the beginning of our relationship, my husband actually felt comfortable telling me about his late wife. There was an aura of mystery about her, mostly because I had not known her prior to her death. To sate my curiosity, I just wanted to know the answers to a few basic questions, and my husband was more than willing to oblige me. We were still in that "getting to know you" stage of newfound love, so he had nothing to lose by sharing some basic background information with me about her - the "non-intimate details" of his late wife, such as where she attended school, what job she held prior to her death, the cause of her death, etc. So, for that time being, I was satisfied with just knowing the basics. Soon after marrying him, however, knowing more about her became an addiction that needed satisfying and a hunger to be sated. The Obsession to Know Her I remember exactly when the obsession took shape. During the first week of our marriage, I found a folder in his old filing cabinet, and in it were signed papers for an adoption process. Apparently, unbeknownst to me, he and his late wife had actually attempted to become the adoptive parents of a child. I looked at the date, and was saddened to see that the papers were filed in between the time she discovered she had cancer and her actual death. Perhaps this meant that she regretted not having any biological children of her own with him, and now wanted to share parenthood with him before she passed away, leaving a legacy of herself behind. Whatever her reasons, I was taken aback. Previously, my husband's late wife had been, in my na