Sharing Your Writing is Scary!
So, you want to be a writer. How healthy is your ego? How about
your self-confidence? Can you handle criticism?
You've joined an on-line writing group and posted your first
write to be critiqued. Was it as hard as you thought it would
be? Yes?
Sharing writing with other writers is scary. Self-esteem and
self-confidence issues are the major causes of putting off
submitting our work, either within an online writing group or
major - minor publishing houses. Wondering if anyone will like
it, or if it is good enough, is stressful. Stress will knot up
your stomach and cause real physical pain. I know from my own
experiences. Even newsletter editor's feel it.
Writing is easy, writing well is not. It takes encouragement,
practice and lots of reading to learn how. You will never get
better if your self-confidence is allowed to wither away and die.
Building, boosting and reinforcing our self-confidence is
something most of us need to constantly work on. If someone
gives you a review and comments on technical issues/errors,
don't go running to the delete button in tears. Hold on a minute
and think about it. Think about why you became a member of a
writing group. It was to learn to write better, wasn't it? Can
you do that by yourself? I can't. We need the feedback from
other writers.
A review should also praise what you did right. First, you
should focus on the positives. Take a moment to feel proud of
that descriptive scene, or that great character only you could
have created. Take pride in your achievements. You'll need this
commitment, especially when you're feeling discouraged or
frustrated by the errors the reviewer pointed out. Take time to
consider the comments. If you don't agree with all of them,
that's okay. The important thing is, you're learning.
You may begin to doubt your writing abilities. We all require
constant assurance our work has potential. Praise keeps us from
giving up when our confidence takes a hit, and it will take some
hits if work is posted for reviews. A good reviewer will
liberally pass out praise along with the suggestions, and they
will be honest with you. If you believe them when they say the
piece needs work in one or two areas; you should also believe
them when they say you're doing a good job in another area. Just
as you study the areas that need work, diligently study the
areas that are good. Figure out why it's good so you can do it
again and again.
Publishers can't take the time to praise or tell you what's
right about the submission. They don't tell you what's wrong
either. They either accept it or they don't. They give no
feedback, no editing help and they leave you wondering what was
wrong when it's rejected. Yeah, rejection hurts, no doubt about
it.
Is your skin thick enough to take rejection? Self-confidence is
another word for thick skin. Your reviewers can help with the
shining and polishing, and you'll gain the confidence you lacked
when you posted your first item.
Write for the joy of writing. Your writing will reflect your
pleasure. The more you learn from receiving and giving good
feedback - the more confidence you'll gain. It is that
confidence that'll soon become evident in the quality of work
you turn out. The most reliable, constant source of confidence
building is yourself. You're good, Write on!