Know Your Audience in Your Wedding Speech
One of the most commonly overlooked aspects of wedding speech
preparation is analyzing the audience. Professional speakers
will tell you that they generally spend a good portion of their
preparation time trying to understand who will be listening to
them speak. The reason they do this is that having information
about your audience is a valuable asset when you begin writing
your speech. An audience analysis will tell you what to put in
and what to leave out. Other factors related to the audience
will give you an idea of how to effectively deliver your speech.
In this article, we'll explore why audience information is so
important and how that information can help you create an
excellent speech.
Why Audience Information is Necessary for the Wedding Speech
First, let me eliminate one misconception you might have about
your audience. Some wedding speakers falsely believe that their
main audience is just the bride and groom. That's not the case.
Your speech is actually being delivered to the entire wedding
party and all of the wedding guests. You don't want to forget
those other people because their impression of your speech could
also influence its reception by the bride and groom.
For example, let's say you chose to include an adult joke in
the speech because you know the groom would find it funny.
You've forgotten that his mother and grandmother are also in the
audience and didn't find it amusing at all, especially since
many of their older friends were in attendance. Even though the
groom may very well have loved your speech, he may not have
liked the lecture he got from his mother because of it.
You want to prevent problems that from arising. For that
reason, you need to keep your speech audience-centered which
means that as you are planning and preparing your speech, you
are keeping the audience at the forefront of your mind. It means
that when you make decisions related to your speech, you do so
by thinking about how the audience would react, not just what
you would prefer or what you think the newly married couple
would prefer.
Before you start throwing up your hands and saying the speech
isn't worth all this trouble, let me just remind you that this
is nothing different than what you do in daily conversations
already. When you talk to friends or co-workers, you do so by
taking into consideration their beliefs and feelings. Unless you
were extremely insensitive, you wouldn't tell a friend who
supports animal rights that you took a gun and killed a squirrel
just for fun, for example. The reason is known as identification.
Identification is "a process in which speakers seek to create a
bond with the audience by emphasizing common values, goals, and
experiences." More simply put: when you are speaking to one or
one hundred people you want to find some way of relating to them
so that they'll be more receptive to your speech. It also means
that you'll do your best not to say or do anything that would
offend a large portion of your audience, unless your purpose is
to shock them which is never a good idea in a wedding speech.
As I explained already, you use identification every day as you
communicate with the various people in your life. The only
difference is that you normally aren't even aware that you're
doing it. When you are planning the wedding speech, however, you
have to be aware of it and focus on it.
One last thing that you need to realize about audiences is that
they are, by nature, egocentric. Egocentric simply means that
they are focused on what concerns them most. Wedding Speeches
bore them unless the content affects them directly.
I'm telling you this not to scare you with the idea that all of
your audience is going to be bored by your speech but to
encourage you to include everyone in your speech in some way.
Wedding guests are typically divided up into three main groups:
family members, friends, and co-workers. If you include a
mention of these groups in your speech, then you are more likely
to keep their attention. You might say for example, "Sherri and
Kevin are blessed to be here in the presence of so many of their
most treasured friends. I know I speak for them when I say we
are thankful to have all of you here to help us celebrate this
wonderful event."
The audience's egocentrism is also one reason why so many
speakers resort to humor when it comes to wedding speeches. When
you add jokes or tell funny stories about the bride and groom,
the audience knows instinctively that you have put those
elements into your speech for their benefit. You're trying to
entertain them and, if your humor is appropriate and effective,
they will respond in a positive manner to your attempts. Keep in
mind, however, that humor is not something everyone can do.