Battling More Romance Myths
Sometimes holding on to the myths and old-fashioned views of
relationships and marriage are all that hold couples back from
having a truly wonderfully fulfilling and happy relationship. It
is important to recognize your spouse and his or her own special
individual with so much to offer you and your relationship if
you love, support and respect your partner. Encouraging your
partner through support, understanding and appreciation are
crucial to breaking through stereotypes and the myths that
surround relationships between men and women. Working through
and dismissing that type of information as old-fashioned,
irrelevant and flat-out wrong can open doors in your marriage
you didn't even know were closed.
When things become tense between you and your partner, keep in
mind some of the stereotypes you might be clinging to and work
to dispel them from your psyche. For example, if one of you or
both of you believe that romance is the best way to hide or
disguise your faults, it simply isn't the case. Someone who is
not a nice person doesn't miraculously change because they
present their spouse with flowers. That spouse still isn't a
nice person. Romantic gestures may disguise some faults for a
short time, but a person's true self always come through. If you
are realistic about who you are and your expectations of each
other, then romance can work wonders to improve your
relationship.
If you give them an inch, they'll take a mile and if you married
them you most likely would have seen it by now. There isn't any
truth to this particular saying and it only sets us up to be
suspicious of someone who really hasn't done anything in order
to earn our suspicion. If you give a little bit consistently,
you will be satisfying your partner and they won't need that
extra. If you don't ever give or give so infrequently that your
efforts are forgotten, your spouse has every right to demand a
mile from you. Give him or her an inch and enjoy the journey
down the rest of the mile together.
If you think that once you marry someone that you can change him
or her, you are in for a rude awakening. You cannot change a
person, yet you can make an impact on how they may see things,
you can help them adjust to new or unfamiliar ways of thinking
and you can always resort to manipulation, but nothing will
change or even fix your spouse. Never manipulate or push your
partner into a direction he or she resists. You may be the one
who needs to alter his or her way of thinking or viewing things.
You may be able to do that on your own or require the help of a
therapist in order to show you the skills you need for better
understanding and acceptance of you and your spouse. If you feel
there are problems between you and your spouse due to
personality conflicts, try working together to learn how to
express thoughts and feelings better and more productively. If
you are both in love, you will find the romance in there
somewhere.