ROMANCE 101—How to turn Your Relationship into a Great
Romance!
OK...Let's talk about romance! The #1 most important thing you
need to turn your relationship into a great romance is DESIRE.
You have to WANT great romance in your life. Well, who wouldn't
want that? But it won't just happen...it will take some effort.
But it will be well worth it!
When asking couples why they think the romance has escaped their
relationships, the most common excuse is TIME. It's sooooooo
hard to find time and energy to devote to your relationships.
But think for a moment back to your courtship. What was
different then? Didn't you have a job then? Didn't you have
other responsibilities then? Of course you did...maybe not to
the extent that you do now, but you still had a schedule to
keep, whether it was attending college, studying, playing
sports, attending club meetings, keeping a job, etc. But somehow
you found the time to "woo" your partner, right? You found time
to date, right? Why? Because you WANTED TO! You planned it into
your schedule and did it! And why were those times together so
special? Because that specific amount of time was set aside and
reserved for one reason...ROMANCE! And during those "dates" you
gave 100% of your attention to each other, right? That's what
made it special.
Now I want you to think about the last time you and your partner
went out to dinner. What did you talk about? Maybe it was the
family finances, or difficulties at work, or...the KIDS. Wow,
what a romantic dinner, huh? That's the problem. You have to
learn to create romantic situations that focus 100% on each
other. Save the "problem solving" for another time. I can't tell
you how many times in the past my husband and I went out to
dinner and whenever we got home, I didn't even feel like we went
out! Why? Because the whole time we were out, we were busy doing
that "problem solving" stuff instead of enjoying what little
time we had together. So, that's the second most important thing
you need to turn your relationship into a great
romance...PRIORITY. Make it a priority to spend quality, FOCUSED
time with your partner. These special times should be set aside
JUST for the two of you to enjoy each others company...nothing
else...PERIOD.
Okay...So now we have established that creating great romance
will require DESIRE, and making it a PRIORITY. The next thing we
need is a PLAN! You may have heard the saying, "You didn't plan
to fail, you just failed to plan!" Anything worth doing requires
a good plan. It can be as simple as scheduling one evening per
week as "date night," or promising to spend "x" amount of time
doing something romantic for your partner each week. There are
plenty of books, magazines, web sites, newsletters, etc. that
will give you lots of ideas to use for your romantic "dates."
Use your imagination & be creative! The most important thing is
to make a plan and then stick to it...no matter what.
After that, all that's left to do is sit back and watch the
magic of romance do it's thing! Oh, I'm not saying that this is
going to be easy...it WILL take a little work. But it will be
FUN work!