WHEN THINGS GET STICKY
There may come a time (though it's not necessary) when things
may become rough in your swinging relationship. And some of
these times are unavoidable, while others can be prevented.
The Silent Treatment
I think that it's in human nature to become quiet when something
is bothering us, rather than to talk about things. Most often,
you find that you get and give the silent treatment when you are
upset about something.
I find that being silence is actually just a way for me to
gather my feelings before I make any rash decisions or
accusations.
But what if you are receiving the silent treatment, what then?
I suggest that attempt to contact the other couple and set up a
time where you can all meet in a non-threatening environment. If
you truly can not understand or imagine what is wrong, then you
can even meet somewhere of their choosing.
Make the silent couple as comfortable as possible.
If you're receiving the silence from your partner, you can do
the same. Of course, most partners are able to talk things over
when they begin to feel upset. But if something has happened,
make sure to find time to talk.
Usually once you get everyone talking about what has been making
them feel bad, you will be able to solve the issues and move on.
Jealousy And You
Being in a swinging relationship implies that you are working
toward fantasies while still keeping your spouse as number one.
However, in the beginning especially, you may feel as though
your partner is having too much fun.
Again, you need to talk about it.
Say everything that is one your mind. Sometimes it helps to
write it all down and then read it to your partner so that you
remember everything.
Set up a situation in which they can only listen and not respond
until you are completely done.
And when you are done, let them speak. You partner will probably
reassure you and work with you to find ways to show you that
they care for you more than anything.
Jealousy that goes unspoken is the harmful kind. In a solid
relationship, it's just a stepping stone that can be moved
beyond.
When The Other Couple Changes Their Mind
Like in all relationships, there may come a point when things
just aren't working out for whatever reason. And you may want to
move on for the sake of everyone involved.
This doesn't have to be a difficult transition when you think of
what you have gained from your interaction. Perhaps you have
just learned all that you needed to learn.
Don't take it personally. Say your goodbyes and wish each other
well.
Of course, if you feel as though you would like to move to a
different couple, then be sure to tell the current couple as
soon as possible. You all want to be in the most supportive
environment that you can be in.
So be sure to openly talk about the possibility.
Swinging is just like any relationship and it can have high
points and low points. The trick is that you need to treat it
like any other relationship--with respect and genuine concern
for each other's welfare.