LINES YOU SHOULDN'T CROSS
A person who is just looking over swinging as a fun way to have
more sex doesn't understand the true meaning of this lifestyle.
Swinging is a way to explore your sexual fantasies and
boundaries with the blessing and support of your partner. And by
enjoying each other in this way, you enable better communication
and deeper trust of your relationship.
But there are always ways to get your self into trouble.
There Are No Little White Lies
When it comes to a swinging relationship, there is no such thing
as a little white lie. Each and every lie that you tell will
become an issue. There needs to be a perfect atmosphere of trust
and truthfulness in order to feel comfortable with each other.
And in any sort of future for the relationship among the group
of couples.
This is really why the recommendation is that only strong
couples get into swinging. The stronger the couple is, the more
likely that good communication lines are already in place.
To think of it another way, you need to be sure that you can
trust the other couple as well. At the very least your privacy
may be compromised. At the most, you can be emotionally hurt.
Crossing Over Boundaries
Swinging can be a great tool to overcome any sexual anxieties
that you might have, but there are limits to this journey.
For one, you can not assume that just because you want something
to happen during a particular sexual excursion that the other
person does as well.
Of course, talking about these boundaries ahead of time will
help.
But you also want to stick to what you're promised to do. Just
because you think that you may be 'helping' someone overcome
something does not mean that they are necessarily ready.
When someone tells you to stop or that they are uncomfortable,
you need to stop IMMEDIATELY.
You will destroy a perfectly good relationship in a moment of
weakness.
Keeping Quiet
On the other hand, the other person will not know about your
boundaries unless you tell them ahead of time.
This is no time to be shy with another couple or with your own
partner. Be clear and up front about the relationship that you
are trying to pursue.
You may want to set up a specific time for everyone to meet up
in a non-sexual environment. This is a great way to continuously
have the lines of communication open for anything that may not
be easy to talk about in a certain mood or setting.
Find a neutral place that is semi-private and give everyone a
chance to talk. If there are problems, then address them at that
point or discuss them and set up another time to figure out
solutions.
When you don't say anything, you are setting yourself up for
problems.
Issues like jealously and anger can rear their ugly heads quite
quickly when there is silence. But a little talking can do a
world of good and keep everyone feeling good about themselves
and their sexual power.