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It is always a difficult decision to make; young crazy hotness
or old crazy hotness. The young girls are just that, young,
delicious, curious; whereas the older girls are better in the
sack, much more straight-forward, and frequently more stable.
Obviously, there is always room for another dame in my bed, but
when it comes time to kick a used one out, the decision must be
made carefully. There is nothing worse than ending up with a
God damn nutcase. Therefore, before narrowing down any of my
potential lays, I like to ask myself two very important
questions: First, is this chick hot, and then, more importantly,
does she like to be called a whore when taking it from behind?
You'll often find that it's actually the sevens and eights that
blow your fucking socks off in the sack while the tens use their
beauty as a crutch to limp their way through sex. So, is this
chick hot? Well is she? When I first saw her was I impressed?
Was I drunk? Could her skirt also be a tube-top? Did I have
trouble keeping my eyes off her rack? Was her hip to tit ratio
even? Was there any part of her body that could be described
using the adjective ghetto? Was there any non-alcohol induced
limping or slurring? Would I lick her ass after she went
jogging? This is what must be answered to truly determine the
actual hotness of a girl. The second question can be a little
tricky because not all girls that are worth adding to ones
stable agree with the term whore. Unfortunately popular culture
and the disappointing shift to a more politically correct
society have made it taboo to refer to broads appropriately.
Don't get me started. Anyway, the easiest way to get a
definitive answer to this question is to simply throw it out
there. I'm talking about her hair wrapped around your hand with
a firm pull-back so while you're pounding her five-hole, and
she's staring up at the mirror on your ceiling doing the
Chewbacca (insert sound bite here), you can confidently bellow,
"Who's my little whore?" Now this is very important; there needs
to be strain in your voice and power in your thrust. It is
actually you that must make her feel that she is indeed your
little whore. The best way to think about this is that you're a
hypnotist, a sexual hypnotist. If she reacts negatively it is
time to make a decision: A. She has been exposed to some fucking
femme-nazi, women's lib bullshit (probably when she was
experimenting with some older, gym teaching dikes back in high
school) or B. Your game is not tight. In this case, if you can't
make that tramp believe that she is a whore, then you'll need to
review some of my remedial articles from past issues. That's
right, from me to you baby; another secret from my playbook. So
remember, focus and don't loose faith, the right one is out
there guys, you just have to stay positive and she will appear!