Satirical Poetry About Tony Blair

All Hail.

Is your hospital full of aliens, despite the cleaning firms,Antenna waving buggies, And creepy crawly germs,Then dont waste another second, now were into election spin,Just complain over and again, and up pops smily smily grin.You just have to critiscise, or mention cancellation lists,And smily smily grin appears, always eager to assist,He doesnt actually do much, just smiles and talks and grins,But takes your mind off the bugs, for the times that he pops in.

Your child has only 15 a levels, and is learning how to write,Apparently thats a bit of a problem, to just get the balance right,But if reading too is tricky, and Oxbridge hopes looking slim,Just bang the drum, and hell soon come, savior smily smily grin.Hell appear with a little girl, who has four of her very own,Who all have masters arts degrees, though still barely half grown,After lecturing her elders, arguments seemingly trite and thin,Theres still the honest eyes, the winning smile, of smily smily grin.

Is your car getting very wobbly, as if weak at the knees,Is it even trying to leave the road, and collide with walls and trees,It might not actually be the car, just the tarmac getting rather thin,So just avoid all the potholes and call in smily smily grin.And as its an election looming, he wont risk a dodgy trip by car,A helicopter will come in zooming, carrying the Great One from afar,He says some isolated craters, may even now be in our roads,Then smily smily grin will joke, it will only bother frogs and toads.

If youre looking for an interview, with He Who Never Says The Same,Smily smily grin will meet you, on any platform that you name,You just nominate a suitable assignation, & hell appear right on time,You wont as youve used the train, and Tory leaves are on the line,Amazingly on arrival hes still there, teeth beaming bonhonomie,And though your biting questions show, that effect is lost on me,He is master of the camera, and of the trained sound bite,And signals and glows and radiates, as if he is the source of light.

And beams over to law and order, onto unrehearsed live TV,Where sycophants are lined up, like ID parades mainlined on glee,And suprise suprise TV eyes, smily smily grin amazingly appears,Faultless brave and magnificent, almost flawless for his years,And yes, the isolated riot, and mass muggings still abound,But according to latest figures, it all happens underground,Anyway most good honest citizens, to believe his statistic talk,Nearly all have vehicles now, and seldom ever have to walk.

What happened to my little dustbin, its now got wheels and blue,And several other containers, which say exactly what to do,Woe betide the recalcitrant owner, putting cardboard with the grist,Thats automatic statutory fining, & slapping on the wrists,However, deface paint or criticise, your beloved huge wheelie bin,Thats straight to jail dont pass go, in the land of smily smily grin.

Or is it a good war youre after, or an end to global strife,He can do both of these at once, and make both seem very nice,Dont believe all that innuendo, put about by the simply evil BBC,Just believe in his fables, just believe we are all still free,He can now cure epidemics, save whole continents with a grin,And smile at all his critics, put under house arrest by him,Every single Royal camera shoot, rock concert or England game,Smily smily grin will muscle in, and make sure hes in the frame.



chorus.

Smily smily grin will save us all
He is powerful strong and tough,
He will carry us all onwards,
He alone will be enough,
His smile calms the multitudes,
Double smile so sincere you swoon,
And when he grins he always wins,
And he always calls the tune.

epilogue.

But the sile is of a con man,
Extra smiles are really smirks,
That we see him yet belive in him,
Can we really be such jerks,
So he grins a winning cheshire grin,
Stretching from ear to ear,
And as long as he gets away with it,
He will surely always be here.

He often counters with an old chestnut,
Used countless times and ways before,
Just throw me out with the washing,
If you really dont want me any more,
That might work well in the commons,
Where whips tell the meek where to sign,
But I bet soon more than blankets,
Will be hanging from Britains lines.

Malcolm Pugh March 5th 2005.

Smiley Smiley Grin has been tried by people
http://www.stiffsteiffs.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/smilysmilygrintonyblair.htm

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ex systems programmer aged 53.