The Law of Aleady

If this is the first time you have spoken wtih your child's teacher this year, well...shame on you. You really need to have done this already.

The good news is you can start over again next year with the next teacher.

The Law of Not My Kid

One of the most difficult type of parents teachers have to deal with is the Not My Kid parent. An NMK parent is the kind who believes their child could do not wrong and any problem is always the fault of someone else.

A couple of years ago we had to talk to the elementary principal of my son's school about a bullying issue. My wife is a school teacher and I'm a family therapist. The poor principal must have thought she was about to deal with the ultimate set of NMK parents. When I opened the meeting by saying we were not NMK parnets and wanted to know and deal with our son's part in all this, huge relief swept across her face.

The point is this - the quickest way to get a teacher on your side is to say and demonstrate the you are not NMK parents.

The Law of Listening

Stephen Covey said it the best:

"Seek first to understand, then to be understood."

Listen to what the teacher has to say. A teacher sees your child five days a week in situations that you do not get to see. There is much to learn when you pay attention.

The Law of a Team

When you handle these kind of converstations, the mindset to have is that we are on the same team, working on what is best for this particular child.

The Law of Accountability

At the same time, as parents it is our responsibility to hold the teacher accountable if they are not doing their job. If it does not get resolved at this level, you can always go higher.

Visit ParentingYourTeenager.com for tips and tools for thriving during the teen years. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 5 day e-program on The Top 5 Things to Never Say to Your Teenager, from parenting coach and expert Jeff Herring.