Resolving Difficult Marriage Problems
Not all marriage problems can be solved, but many can. As
recently as a few generations ago, divorce was not considered a
viable option for most people. Even today, there are religious
groups who consider divorce unacceptable except in the event of
certain extenuating circumstances - such as abuse or adultery.
That point of view is not for everyone, but it is undeniable
that marriage problems are put into a different perspective when
there is no real choice but to solve them.
That having been said, it probably wasn't a good thing for
individuals to feel that they were 'stuck' in a marriage - that
they had no choice regarding whether to continue with the union.
We are fortunate that we live in a time when people have choices
regarding the direction of their lives. Regarding marriage
problems, though, it is clearly better to solve them if this can
be done, particularly if there are children in the picture.
Marriage problems vary in type and severity, but there's one
thing that many if not most have in common; most marriage
problems, and their resolutions, depend on communication.
Communication is the key to all effective relationships.
Communication styles vary, but presumably married couples are
drawn together in the first place because there is a basic
similarity or compatability between their communication styles.
It takes time to maintain communication. Many marriage
counselors recommend that couples have a weekly 'date' with one
another, a time when there is a break from the regular routine
and the couple do something relaxed and enjoyable together.
After there are children, the weekly date becomes more
difficult, but its more important than ever. Many couples become
too busy to spend time with each other alone once there are
children. Think about it, though - isn't it worth your while to
take the time to ensure that your child's parents have a good
marriage, and are able to provide a stable home? Parents that
are happy together tend to have happier children, too.
Marriage problems, large or small, can be one of the great
challenges in life. When dealt with head on, however, they need
not get out of hand - in fact, dealing with these challenges as
they arise can be very rewarding. It can even strengthen your
marriage in the long run, and that means that your overall
quality of life can benefit greatly as well.