Love Your Body, Forgive Your "Self"
This may sound a bit odd coming from me, but I believe that
regardless of what you eat - how many times each week you
exercise or what particular diet you decide to try - if you do
not have your inner life in order, it will be difficult to be at
peace with yourself and your body.
In discussing ways to love your body, therefore, it is important
to look at ways we can have peace with ourselves. Moreover, in
this article, we will discuss an idea you may not have
considered: forgiveness.
The Past Is The Past, Let It Go:
The most important process we can undertake for our health and
well being is to make a conscious effort not to leave negative
energy embedded in the past. In effort to move into present
time, and be at one with our own body, it becomes essential to
let go of all the hurts and struggles that have led us to this
moment. There is only one road to this state of oneness,
however: The act of letting go.
As it turns out, I'm not the only one who stands by the belief
system of releasing the past in effort to improve the health of
our minds, as well as our body and spirit. Carolyn Myss in her
healing lecture series: Why People Don't Heal, makes the claim
that forgiveness is the #1 way to move forward in health. And
she can back it up. She has used the healing process of letting
go to transform people from near death to glowing health. With
this in mind then, ask yourself: Is there anyone or anything
from my past which prevents me from moving forward? Said
differently: is there something in your past that's holding you
back?
Learn To Forgive Others, The Process:
This brings us to the next step in our progress of releasing the
past: learning to forgive others. Keep in mind, most often
others say and do things as a result of how they are feeling
about themselves. In most cases, whether they are aware of it or
not, unhealthy individuals inflict their wounds upon us to salve
their own pain. This can no longer affect us if we make a full
effort to do as Don Miguel Ruiz says in his book The Four
Agreements, and "not take things personally." When we do take
things personally, we really could gather up a lifetime of
emotional baggage.
As it pertains to body image and self-esteem, however, is there
anyone you need to forgive? Has someone knowingly or unknowingly
inflicted a negative body view onto you? Here's my personal
example: When I was in high school, I had a "friend" who was
popular, pretty and blonde. As an introvert and troubled youth,
I took everything most personally. Imagine my emotional baggage
when any time I would so much as mention my interest in a
particular boy, she'd make sure she would go out of her way to
get his interest.
Needless to say our friendship wasn't long term. And later I
learned she was living in an unstable home. Yet, when I was
younger, her actions just plain hurt my feelings and gave me a
negative self image. Now I realize my insecurities at the time
were my wounds to heal, and once I'd forgiven her and not taken
her actions personally, I could move forward without holding on
to past insecurity.
Learn To Live In the Present, An Exercise:
When we can learn to let go of the past and live fully in the
present, we are also growing. After all, how could we grow if we
have negative energy lodged in the past? Moreover, there are
many other active ways to learn to live in the present. Begin
the process by taking a current inventory of your body. I like
to do this by using my journal (you do have a journal, don't
you?)
Here's how it works:
* Take a scan of your body. First take body part by body part
and make a note of what you are happy about. Ask yourself: What
do I love about me? At first this may seem awkward, but I cannot
stress the importance of taking time to spend time with your
self and learning to know "you."
* After you've noted all the positive aspects of your self, make
note of those parts you'd like to change. Keep in mind your
boundaries - are these changes within your control? If so, make
notes to yourself as to how you may go about making a change for
the better. If changes are out of your control - take time every
day to consciously send love to those parts of your body. When
ever possible, tell your mind that you accept your body and your
self for who you are, right now.
* When you've finished, take a look at your list. What can you
do right now that would make you love a part of yourself?
Consider this your permission slip: Today take time to do
something good for yourself. Better yet, walk to the phone right
now and make an appointment to do something for your self. My
favorite self-love activities? Here's a couple suggestions.
Ladies: A manicure or pedicure? Gentlemen: A massage?
Today, take time to focus on all of your positive qualities.
Make an effort to forgive the past and move into the present
moment. Prepare to grow!
Journal Entries:
Make note: What do I love about myself? What can I do for myself
this week that is "just for me"?