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Choosing A Vendor
By Hershey Wier
http://www.HersheyWier.com
Choosing vendors to work with in my small business is something I take seriously. I make these decisions with a view of continuing a long-term relationship. Here's what I ask myself when choosing and working with a vendor.
-- What are the qualities I'm looking for in this person? -- Who do I know who can refer me to who I want? -- Have I got this down in my "questions" page of my journal. The "questions page" is part of a system I use in order to bring about clarity and positive outcomes. Having all of this written down is important in getting the process going.
I write down what I am looking for and affirm verbally that I have found it. Soon enough, I have.
Once in a while I do find a disappointment. The agreement we had made together isn't working out, for example. What to do?
A) Reflect
--Did I give myself ample time in which to find a vendor? --Did I list this question on my "questions page" and offer it up to God / the universe before making a decision? --How did I feel when agreeing to work with this vendor? Uneasy? At peace?
--Was I clear with this vendor about expectations?
B) Clarify with the vendor
--Is her/his understanding of the job the same as mine? --If not, I specify what needs to be done. --I check back intermittently to see if the job is going as planned.
C) Heart Attitude
The above looks straightforward, but what complicates things is our feelings. If we feel we've been wronged, overcharged, stalled, it is easy to rush to judgment and assume the vendor is not being fair. The vendor too, can feel insulted for being questioned. The relationship can be harmed because of misperceptions, misunderstandings, and hurt feelings.
Even in business relationships, we are dealing with human beings, and as such, the emotive aspect cannot be ignored. I feel this is particularly true in my experience here in Japan.
Being foreign and female further complicate the mystery of how to succeed in getting things done in this country.
So, say there is a misunderstanding, and after repeated attempts to explain, the vendor is not getting the picture and neither am I.
I go back and check my motives, my heart attitude toward this person.
Questions to ask:
Where was my prep on the spiritual level? Had I journaled about it? Lifted it up for the universe to deal with? Had I practiced the conversation beforehand? And, what was my heart attitude when doing so? Did I picture this vendor in a warm way or in an antagonistic way? With trust or suspicion?
This is important, because our heart attitude is visible to others.
Case In Point:
I once had a meeting with a gentleman who I absolutely knew was trying to overcharge by a long shot. The thoughts I had developed about the situation were negative and non-productive.
Before going to my next meeting with him, while at home, I sat and visualized this person in a positive way. I tried to picture his family, though I had never met them. I tried to picture him in a positive light. Then, I visualized the meeting in my mind, from beginning to end.
In this visualization, I entered the meeting area free of angst or suspicion. My tone in dealing with him was humble and matter of fact. I worked on this visualization process for several days.
It worked. At the actual meeting, things turned out in a way that I thought was much fairer than was presented in the previous meeting.
What "works" here is:
1) Connecting with God / the electricity of the universe through prayer, visualization, journaling; 2) making an effort to expect the best from others and for yourself;
3) a benevolent aura and attitude.
Case In Point:
I'm currently in a situation where I feel I have a "right" to receive a discount on the original quoted fee for a job we outsourced because of various complications. However, after working through the problems with our vendor, I decided to withhold any discussion about money. The reasons are varied, and concern the total picture - his business, his family, and not just this one job, this one snapshot in time we're looking at right now.
D) Rules of the Road
--Get the big picture.
Resist rushing to judgment, prematurely claiming our "rights" and pointing out wrongs. As we see in so much of life, "right" and "wrong" are relative and seldom grounded in concrete concepts that can be agreed upon. What is right for one is wrong for another. Get a clear understanding before speaking and give the benefit of the doubt when possible.
--Don't micromanage (corporate euphemism for "nitpicking").
What you may have lost in a few dollars here or a minor disappointment there will come back to you multiplied if you can get through the misunderstandings with grace and build a long term relationship. That's the law of reaping and sowing.
--Prepare your heart attitude in advance.
We often work on the technical and logistical details of our meeting agenda, and forget the spiritual, emotive aspect. Perform a visualization of your meeting before it takes place.
See it going in a mutually beneficial manner, and with our heart attitude in a positive mode. Clear any emotional static that may have been left from previous meetings - pronounce it gone, visualize it gone, and let it rest as a bygone.
Envision yourself flanked by three muses - goodness, patience and wisdom - who will inspire you at opportune times throughout your meeting.
A relationship with a business vendor is a human relationship. Humans have unlimited potential for good. There is so much to be gained when we make the effort to keep our bridges intact.
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Hershey Wier, MBA, speaks, writes and coaches on personal and professional development.
She founded ANEWIST Personal & Professional Development Services in order to offer fresh insight, guidance and support to people in achieving more fulfillment in their life path. Her unique blend of creative techniques and down-to-earth principles gives a balanced, enjoyable approach to creating synergistic, positive outcomes in life.
Visit http://www.HersheyWier.com
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