There is a dreadful substance inside your dog's butt that's aching to get out, and unless you rise to this disgusting challenge, consequences can be dire.
It's called expressing your dog, and it is a chore so foul that it was recently featured on the Discovery Channel's "Dirty Jobs." Actually, "dirty" hardly does the situation justice.
If your dog is chewing and biting "back there" or dragging its rump across the ground, chances are he is in need of a little expression - of his sphincter glands, that is.
Dogs have special glands that secrete an especially - shall we say - fragrant substance into their poop. It's what makes a dog's poop her own, and it's what dogs sniff for when they are investigating other dogs' rears or their droppings.
Problems occur when these glands get clogged up. The musky fluid begins to collect, and the dogs begin to experience irritating pressure and pain - like a turbo case of hemorrhoids.
Usually, the dog is able to express - or squeeze out - some of the fluid and get the glands flowing again. If your dog has ever been inexplicably stinky - almost like he has gotten into rotten fish or something, then chances are you've experienced a do-it-yourself expression job.
If you're lucky, the sacred event took place outside, but just as often the residue ends up saturating carpet or expensive furniture. Yum!
Things get worse if the dog is unable to alleviate the problem, and the situation goes unchecked. As you might imagine, this can be an excruciating experience for your dog. Finally, you will most likely be saddled with an expensive vet bill, and your dog will end up needing a most uncomfortable surgical procedure.
Getting Down to Dirty Business
All of this can be easily avoided by a little human intervention. Expressing a dog is a simple enough procedure - it's the mental challenge that is most difficult to overcome. Vile fluids squirting from a dog's butt is certainly not a mental image you'd want to hold during meditation or anything.
Honestly, it's really not bad. The liquid smells like fish, not