The loss of a spouse is one of the most difficult loses we experience as your entire day-to-day life is turned upside-down. The grieving process following this loss is divided into five time sequences of grief. One to four months would be called SHOCK, five to eight months of mourning is DENIAL, nine to twelve months is ANGER, thirteen to seventeen months is DEPRESSION, eighteen to twenty four months is INTEGRATION, ADJUSTMENT and TRANSITION.

While everyone experiences grief and mourning in his or her own way and time, predictably there are time sequences and emotions common to all. You may find yourself going through each of the emotional stages of shock, denial, anger, depression, and finally, integration, adjustment and transition in the order listed, or you may find yourself jumping all over the place in a forward-and-backward movement.

You may even seem to skip one stage completely, only to encounter it long after you have thought yourself emotionally healed. How so? You may not have allowed yourself to recognize, for instance, anger directed inward, or directed outward toward your late spouse or even the world-at-large until you are feeling stronger and in control of your life once again.

SHOCK is an alarm response to a sudden, violent or upsetting disturbance. Whether your loss is sudden or expected, the element of shock is still present. It is an alarm state that protects you from the flood of emotions with which you may be unable to cope. You may experience it as anxiety, insomnia, and /or numbness. It helps you get through this initial time period. It is