Dogs are truly amazing. They get away with stuff that you otherwise allow. For example, if a neighbor came over and took a crap on your carpet, you'd never let him or her back. But all you say to a dog is, "Bad dog, bad dog." It's as if this creature can only understand two-word sentences.

But if you have a dog, you have developed a sort of sliding scale for acceptable behavior-like drinking out of a toilet bowl then running and licking you on the lips. Or like picking at a certain portion of his anatomy, then giving you a big smooch. But all things aside, dogs are truly loveable.

And dogs seem to get Altzheimers at about age one. Like he'll get up from the couch, walk about three paces, then turn around and get back on the couch. Like, he forgot what he was going to do.

And dogs like to stink. I had this beagle who hated to get a bath. He'd hide until I found him for his cleaning.

They even like to roll in something rotten along the road, like a dead groundhog.

And when they go outside in the winter, they like to take a crap on the porch rather than in the snow!

On the other hand, dogs develop a healthy distrust for the government long before most of us become bitter and disenchanted. For example: dogs bark at the mailman because he's the only government worker they usually get to see.

Nevertheless, the dog is about one of the best companions. A dog will defend you to the death, give you unconditional love and wake you up when Robert brings your 16 year old daughter home at 1230.

A dog is always happy to see you when you arrive home. A cat or a hamster seem to care less.

If you don't have a dog and plan to get one make sure that you do it right. Read some literature. They don't like to be alone. In a way, you have a child in your residence. Make sure you understand the dog's needs: shots, flea collar, exercise, diet,etc.

A dog suited to your lifestyle will make a good friend. Some people have difficulty with dogs of the Northland that they house in the tropics. So be careful. Make sure your dog doesn't get overheated in the summer, or is left outside in the cold,cold winter.

There are more gifted people to give you the run down on dog care. Check them out on the web or the library.

Gene Smith is a writer who lives in West Virginia.