Do you know how your kids really think? Would you like to find out and build character too? Here are 3 simple questions that you can use. Recently, my granddaughter, Daniela (Dani), rushed home to tell her mother, "I can tie my shoes!" Andrea hugged and praised her.

At our Sunday breakfast, Andrea proudly announced, "Dani can tie her shoes!" Daniela's grin widened as everyone congratulated her.

Having counseled kids for years, I know the joy of understanding how children think. Helping kids discuss their successes is a great way to understand their thinking and build character too.

Later, while Dani and I sat on the sofa, I used my 3 simple questions to help Dani discuss her success even more.

"Dani, can you tell me more about tying your shoes?" I asked.

"Well, I was at PE and I tied them," she answered.

"What was happening when you tied your shoes?"

"I was standing against the wall. I saw that one of my shoes was untied. I asked the teacher to tie it but she said, "No," answered Dani.

"What were you thinking when you tied your shoes?" I asked.