The causes of premature ejaculation (reaching your climax sooner than you'd like) are grossly misunderstood. As such, many men think that their sexual performance - especially how long they're able to last before climaxing - is unchangeable and not able to be improved. This is completely untrue.
Just as you can lift weights to add muscle to your skinny frame, or practice your golf swing to lower your handicap, you can improve your sexual prowess and eradicate premature ejaculation forever.
One of the best ways to MASSIVELY improve your sexual arousal control in bed is by understanding your Point of No Return. Your Point of No Return, or PoNR, is the split-second before you climax and ejaculate. It's that fleeting moment which, once passed, means you've completely lost control of your sexual arousal and that ejaculation is imminent and unavoidable. Most men know when they hit their own personal PoNR simply because they quickly become aware of the fact that they're about to climax - an intense 'glow' of pleasurable sensations is usually what clues them in.
However, just because most of us guys know when we've lost control by passing our PoNR, doesn't mean that we're able to use that knowledge to extend and improve our performance - just that we're shamefully aware of when it's almost over.
Here's what most guys do:
For the first couple of minutes of love-making, which is usually just the start of the first sexual position, they perform care-free - premature ejaculation feels like a distant problem not worth worrying about. After all, so far so good!
A short while later, because of rapidly heightened pleasure sensations, they'll suddenly become aware of their PoNR. They know that if they don't change something RIGHT NOW - either by stopping the sex or massively slowing it down - they'll ejaculate prematurely. Unbeknownst to them, however, their fate for this sexual encounter has been sealed. Properly controlling their sexual arousal from this point on is going to be an uphill struggle. In short, they're fighting a losing battle.
So, what SHOULD the guy in the example above have done? How could he have used his PoNR to reverse and ultimately control his sexual arousal? And, therefore, extend and improve his performance?
The answer lies in WHEN you take action. The guy in our example above, like so many millions of men, waited until right before reaching his PoNR to recognise that he was in trouble - he did this because up until feeling that sudden rush of pleasure down below he thought he was performing well and that his arousal was under control. However, he didn't realise that his arousal levels has been increasing quickly and silently.
What YOU must do is establish a pleasure scale in your mind that ranges from 1 to 10. 1 on the pleasure represents no arousal - how you feel before sex begins. 10 is the Point of No Return - the moment when nothing you could possibly do would lower your arousal and give you back control over your sexual performance.
Imagine the Pleasure Scale in your head, with 1 at the bottom and 10 at the top and follow the 4 point plan below. Doing so will give you an improved ability to recognize when your arousal levels are increasing too quickly and thereby allow you to take action and use some select methods and techniques to DECREASE your arousal and continue on with great sex...without ever stopping or otherwise interrupting your love-making. That, my friend, is the mark of a true sexual legend.
The 4 Point Plan:
1. From when the second sex begins till the moment you're READY to climax, keep the pleasure scale in mind.
2. Every so often, take a mental note of where you are on the pleasure scale. Have you reached the halfway point yet? Are you around a 2 or 3? Keep identifying where you currently are on the pleasure scale - doing so allows you to never do what the guy in the example above did - lose track and therefore lose control.
3. When you feel you've reached around the 6 mark on the pleasure scale, think about where you are in the love-making session. If you're only a couple of minutes in, then proceed to step 4 of this 4 point plan. If you're over halfway through how long you'd LIKE to last, then continue on regardless.
4. Before you reach 7 or 8 on the pleasure scale, CHANGE something to decrease your arousal levels. Whether it's your sexual position, the strength or speed of your strokes or the depth and quality of your breathing, altering your sexual technique at this point of the pleasure scale will give you back your control and thereby allow you to extend your performance and boost your lasting power.
Using this simple formula, of regaining control 2 or 3 steps BEFORE their PoNR, instead of immediately prior to it, the majority of men are able to almost double their staying power. You can, too, so give it a try!
Edward White helps men with premature ejaculation and is the author of "The Ultimate Orgasm and Ejaculation Control Manual".
For much more information on the Point of No Return, and for methods of decreasing your arousal levels quickly and easily once you've learnt about yours, visit his site at: http://www.prejaculation.com