Finding Someone Special
Browsing through the personal classifieds can be quite
frustrating if you really don't know what qualities or the type
of personality it is that you are searching for in the person
you are seeking, or in the relationship you are seeking.
Questions you need to ask yourself before and as you are reading
through the personal sections again are: Why are you searching
for someone, do you want a companion, a serious relationship or
just to make friends with someone new with the hopes of dating.
Who are you looking for, are you searching for someone tall,
short, thin, stout, young, old, divorced, widowed, single,
married, and the list goes on to include all personal choices
and preferences in people.
Discussing this theory a little more in detail - If you have a
problem dating someone with kids, you should skip over the
classifieds that reveal those people who have kids or you will
only be letting yourself down in the end when you are building a
relationship. This theory pertains to all of the listings, for
example, if you are searching for someone that is just for you,
without ever sharing that person with another, search for
someone who has never been married or who is not a widow
(widower). Once you know whom you are searching for, you will be
able to read the personal classifieds with more confidence and
decision making abilities.
Read the classifieds completely, tracking the writing that
interests you the most so that you can go back and compare,
reread or contact that person. Reading through the entire
personal section, or at very least the section that applies your
target interest group, you will find a variety of people with
vast differences in personalities just through the short
descriptions available.
Now is the tough time to write your contact letter, made much
simpler if you have already created your profile for replies to
read about you. Starting your reply is easy with an opening such
as, 'I have read your profile and found you are most intriguing
(interesting, exciting, provocative)' or you could use something
more elaborate such as 'Your profile interested me to the point
where I had to contact you right away to find out what we have
in common'. While there are many expressions and various phrases
you can use when writing your opening letter, the contact letter
is truly going to be a reflection of your personality, and what
you are searching for in a relationship.
The first example of 'I have read your profile and found you are
most intriguing', would reveal that you are interested. Are you
searching for friendship in the classified section? Try using
the first example building on that sentence to read along the
lines of: 'I would like the opportunity to get to know you
better and talk a while'. But if you are searching for a lover
through the personals, the second sentence could read: 'I really
would love to get to know you better, find out what type of
person you are searching for and hopefully to create a match
with you'. The point here is to keep your true feelings within
the boundaries of words, not scaring off someone if you are just
wanting to be friends, while on the other hand if you are
searching for a lover don't hide behind words of a friendly
chat.
Top ideas to use in your opening introduction letter are express
your interest to your potential 'date' using your writing to
express why you are contacting that person. Reveal to this
person how you propose to meet their needs in their search for a
friend, companion or lover using expressive words such as 'I
intend to' or 'I would like to' or even 'I have been searching
through the classifieds and found your profile appealing to me
because'. Give just a few hints about your where you are
located, without revealing to much about your without
determining whether the two of you will continue a conversation.
Use phrases like, 'I am from the east coast' or 'I live south of
California' or other such general terms, revealing your location
to a particular location through later conversations. Your
initial contact with a proposed 'date' should be about the type
of person you are searching for, why you have been using
resources online to search for someone special, and what you are
hoping to gain from a relationship from this person with
personal details revealed through additional conversations as
your 'relationship' trust grows.
Online personals have been created for the user to act
anonymously while investigating the possibilities of friendship,
love and for finding that someone special to spend your life
with. Using your thoughts and feelings through this situation,
creatively with expressive words without misleading readers will
allow you to reach your destination, of finding that someone
special, faster and easier that you would be able to in any
other situation.