Terrible Twos, Terrible Teens/Dr. Bill Gallagher, DC
Terrible Twos, Terrible Teens by Dr. Bill Gallagher, DC
Someone once told me that being a teenager is a second chance to
learn what you missed when you were two. At first it sounded
like a stretch but, after taking a closer look, it was right on
target.
Growing up is a challenging process that does not end after
passing those teen years. Hopefully, it will continue right on
through adulthood and, for that matter, for as long as you live.
For now let's take a closer look at that most difficult time of
growth, both physically and emotionally.
This is a time when your body goes through a tremendous growth
spurt. In a relatively short span of your life your body grows
to almost twice the size of what it use to be. Arms and legs
seem to have a mind of their own as you try to coordinate their
movement. Muscle mass increases to help you run faster and jump
higher. Everything changes so fast that when you pass a mirror
you may not be sure who that is looking back at you.
It is a time of considerable learning. Information pours in at
such a pace and on a daily basis that it is amazing anyone could
process it all. Even so, you manage to catalog most of it
somewhere in your brain for future use. Then, each time one of
those stored bits of information shows up again, everyone else
in the room can see your lights turning on. All that information
will also be used to help you make decisions as to what is right
and what is wrong. You learn more and more to avoid the things
that hurt and go toward those that bring you pleasure.
Hopefully, you also learn which are good choices.
It is a time when communication is probably the biggest issue.
Yes, you have a vocabulary that allows you to get what you need
but, in order to function, you need to learn more words and how
to use them more eloquently. Not being able to do so can lead to
insurmountable frustration, where you don't know whether to be
upset with yourself or your parents, who simply don't understand
you.
It is a time when, for some unknown reason, you have a need to
test the limits. When you are trying to convince your parents
that you are old enough to do what you want to do and
responsible enough to make your own decisions. When you are not
always understood. When the words fail and you know you are not
being heard, and the frustration leads you to simply have a fit.
Such is the plight of a two-year old, or was that a teenager?
The only real differences are braces and acne.
Both have to learn how to maneuver in a body that is growing
faster than they are. Both have so much to learn. At two, it is
counting to ten; as a teen, it is algebra and calculus. For
each, it is just as much of a challenge. Both need to explore
their ever expanding world. At two, that is rarely out of a
parent's sight; for a teen, the limits drop as the whole world
is opened up. Decisions and responsibilities expand too, from
learning hot and cold, to more complex issues of life and
interpersonal relationships.
Then there is communication. At two, the vocabulary may be
limited but it is quite sufficient to convey one's basic needs.
With practice, single word commands expand into three word
sentences that make it easier to deal with parents and others.
Teens are no different. They have more words, but need to
develop a greater command of the language in order to get their
more complex ideas across to others.
Both go through the frustration of all these issues and of not
being understood and, when that boils over, there is little
difference between a tantrum on the living room floor and
stomping off to your bedroom and slamming the door. The lessons
are basically the same, only the scale changes.
Oddly enough, the lesson here is probably best given to the
parents or those teens who will be parents: The "Terrible Twos"
are not really that terrible, especially once you get past them
and, for that matter, neither are those teenage years. Just
remember that both are growing and need to be understood. You,
no doubt, recall being a teenager yourself more than you do
having been two. As a parent, you have the advantage of seeing
both stages in your child. The moral of this story is they are
no different than a one-year old who learned how to walk. No
matter how many times they fell they got back up and tried again
because you were there to support them. Dr Bill Gallagher is the
director of Run Drugs Out of Town Run, Inc.
http://rundrugsoutoftownrun.org
MORE INFO HERE: http://joanbramsch.com/counseling eens.shtml