Top Ten Ideas for Back to School
This time of year can take some major adjusting for you and your
kid. Life goes from the peaceful, relaxing, and bummin' around
(yeh, right) of summer to the hectic start of a new school year.
I've compiled a list of the top ten ideas to help everyone deal
with the changes in the schedules and to lessen the stress of
the season. Just for grins, I've done this Dave Letterman style.
Number 10...Teachers - make an appointment within the first two
weeks of school to get to know your kid's teacher(s)...this is
especially important if you are not fortunate enough to be
either the custodial parent or have shared parenting...it could
make all the difference in the world. Tidbit of advice: when you
do talk to the teacher(s), don't tell them all of the problems
you have with your ex - they are smart enough to figure that out
for themselves; do tell them you need to have a copy of
everything that gets sent to your ex from the school and you
would like weekly updates of classroom things. Also, take along
enough self-addressed, stamped envelopes to leave with them so
that they can send you something every week.
Number 9...Support system - when you need to be in two places
at the same time, this is indispensable. Hopefully, you will
find someone who is a parent of another kid in the same class.
That way you can get info on school assignments and other
activities. Make sure your kid knows who these people are. If
someone else will be picking them up from school or an event,
they will know the 'secret word' that you and your kid have come
up with. When my son was young, it was 'leprechaun'. We never
needed to use it, but it was ready just in case and we both felt
safer because of it.
Number 8...Debrief - whether you pick up the kid from school or
daycare or meet them at the house, you need to know what went on
all day. You can do this when you first see them after school or
during dinner. Try to gauge their moods, celebrate their small
(or big) victories, discuss upcoming events and activities,
listen for those difficult times they have had during the day.
Also, make it a routine to check on assignments, etc. that they
have hopefully given to you to see.
Number 7...Activities - Try to plan at least one day a week
without any activities. We all need down time. I limit my kid's
activities to two days a week which leaves time for school
assignments, hanging out with friends, and just being a kid.
This is difficult at times because some sports teams want to
practice four nights a week and have games every weekend. While
that may be fine once a kid is in junior high, I believe it has
the possibility to limit a kid's overall growth when they are
still in elementary school.
Number 6...Friends - Each school year can bring changes in
friendships because there are different kids in classes, kids
transfer in and out of schools, etc. Time has to be made for
friends, whether it is play dates for younger kids, phone calls
or movies when they are older.
Number 5...Play - All families are busier than we would like
these days, but it is important that kids have a way to unwind
after school. Your kid may enjoy playing video games, playing
with neighborhood kids, working on hobbies, or have other ideas
of play. Giving them 30 minutes every evening to play can make
getting their homework and other responsibilities done much
easier.
Number 4...Study - Having a time and place to do homework or
other studies promotes discipline and an enjoyment of learning.
Even if your kid doesn't have a school assignment every day, you
can give them small projects to work on. Maybe it would be
researching about hurricanes, helping with dinner (math skills),
or having them pick a topic they want to know more about and
working on that. You need to be available for them when they
have questions or need help, so don't go too far. Also, be sure
to look over their assignments - it will keep you informed on
what they doing and you will be able to give them some
constructive feedback.
Number 3...Read - Yep, the old standby, reading. There isn't a
skill that is used more over a lifetime and it's important to
instill good habits. So, let your kid see you reading every day
and try to set aside at least 15 minutes for them to read every
day. You could encourage them to carry a book in their backpack,
to read in the car or on the bus, or even to read a book on CD
or tape while they are doing other things.
Number 2...Hanging out - Don't over schedule your kid's week or
yours. Maybe you want to order a pizza one night a week and
watch a movie or maybe you could just leave time for doing
nothing and then see what your kid does with it. You can learn a
lot about your kid this way. They just may surprise you in what
they come up with.
The Number 1 idea is to get ready...refer to 'Morning Chaos' -
another article in this section. If you use the tips in it, you
will be prepared for almost anything and getting ready will be a
whole lot easier.
Life changes are difficult. Even though the transition from
summer vacation to the school year comes every year, it doesn't
make it any easier.
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