Let Your Children Name the New Baby
Choosing a baby name is an important job, so make your children
feel important by letting them help you name the new baby. After
all, you're not the only one who's having a baby - your whole
family is ! Use the process of naming the baby as an opportunity
to get your other children involved in and excited about their
new brother or sister, and make the process fun. Try a little
humor, with wild list-making sessions that may eventually lead
you to the perfect baby name that will fill that vacant space on
your family tree.
Here are some of the points, both serious and silly, that you
can encourage your children to consider when sifting through the
thousands of possible baby names that are floating around out
there. I've added a few sample names, from appropriate to
absurd, to make your children laugh and enjoy the name choosing
process, and to get your whole family thinking.
First of all, don't choose a first name that is SO odd and
unusual that, as your child grows up, his or her friends will
endlessly make fun of it. Perhaps "Sassafras" or
"Tintinabulation" are not the best name choices. On the other
hand, you may not want a name that is SO common that every third
child in the playground has it, too. Of course, what is "too
common" changes every few years. When I was a child in the early
1960s, every other kid answered if someone called out "Bobby" or
"Joey."
You might also want to avoid a baby name that is so
up-to-the-minute and trendy that it may sound ridiculous by the
time your child hits kindergarten. I'd think twice before naming
a baby "Megabyte" or "Bloggy." Then again, if the name is VERY
old fashioned, that can also lead to taunting by other children.
How would you like to be in the third grade and be named
"Horatio Cornelius" ? Other old fashioned names, though, such as
Rachel and Sarah, never seem to go out of style.
Sometimes a name sounds really cute on a tiny baby, but
inappropriate on a mature adult. Should anyone have to go
through life as "Dimples" or "Pinky" or "Bitsy" ? Still, there
are other names that may suit a serious bank executive, but
sound too somber for a toddler - take "Harold Thaddeus" or
"Mildred Hortense," for instance. Shoot for some sort of middle
ground between cutesy-pie babyish and dour fuddy-duddy.
You may also want to avoid names, or combinations of first and
middle name, that have a very strong negative association with a
particular person or event in history, like "John Wilkes" or
"Lee Harvey."
Consider the spelling of any baby name that you and your
children like. Will it be so difficult to spell or to pronounce
that your child will be condemned to a lifetime of seeing and
hearing people mangle his or her name and having to endlessly
correct them ? As a case in point, I might have been named
"Ides" (pronounced "Ee-dess") but, luckily for me, my parents
dropped the idea for fear that I might wind up being called
"Ides" (as in "Beware the Ides of March").
After all of the "don'ts" I've mentioned, how about some "dos"
for your kids to ponder. Maybe you'd like to name the baby in
honor of a special relative, past or present, or a close friend
of the family. Think about all the people in your life who've
been dear to you. You may even choose to show respect for a
famous person you really admire.
Another possibility is to celebrate your ethnic roots by
choosing a current or traditional name that comes from your
family's cultural heritage, or some branch of it, if your
lineage blends several different ethnic backgrounds.
How about naming the baby for a book or movie character that you
and your children love ? Perhaps a little "Harry" or "Dorothy"
is waiting to be born. (Possibly a tiny "Pinocchio" or
"Thumbelina," although those may be a bit extreme.)
The meanings of baby names are a popular element to consider.
You could begin with a special meaning, like "beloved" or
"gentle" or "courageous," and then see what names stem from
those words. Different languages and cultures can lead you to
various name choices, all with the same specific meanings. If
you want to avoid negative meanings, however, I suppose that
"Picklepussia" would be out of the running.
You may want to use a particular letter of the alphabet as your
starting point. If you're expecting a baby girl you might, for
example, list every girl's name that you can think of that
begins with the letter V - Valerie, Victoria, Veronica, Violet,
and so forth. For a more novel approach, how about drawing from
all the first names that contain six letters - Joseph, Daniel,
Joshua... or seven - Matthew, Malcolm, William...
If you find a first name that you all like, consider its variant
forms, too. For example, Christine might also lead you to
Kirsten, Christina, Kristen, or Crystal. A potential baby Mary
might wind up being named Miriam, Marion, Maryanne, Marie,
Maria, Marilyn, or Marlene.
For any name that you all like, try it on for size and live with
it for a while. If you name the baby Melissa, will she end up
being called "Missy" or "Mel" ? Think of all the nicknames that
any given name might spawn and be sure that you can live with
the nicknames, as well as the full version of the name. Avoid
inadvertently negative nickname-producing names. Don't name the
baby "Smellonius" if you don't want him to be called "Smelly" by
his schoolmates.
Once you've arrived at a short list of first names that you,
your spouse and your children can all agree upon, look at each
name within the context of the full name that it will be a part
of. Find a first and middle name that suit and go nicely with
each other, and with the sound of your last name. "Ernesto
Casimir Jones" might not create the most pleasing effect and
"Calliope Bathsheba Schmidt" may not quite roll off the tongue.
Test lots of combinations of your family's favorite name choices
until you hit upon the perfect one. Then be sure to examine the
resulting set of initials. You don't want to give your baby a
beautiful and well thought out full name, only to later discover
that the monogrammed handkerchiefs will read "P.I.G" or "Y.U.K."
or "D.U.M." So avoid the likes of "Philip Ian Green" (alias
"Pig") or "Yelburton Uriah Keep" (commonly called "Yuck") or
"Doris Ursulla Martin" (a.k.a. "Dumb").
If your favorite name passes that test, next imagine it as it
will be used by different people on different occasions. Using
John Q. Public as an example, let's look at all of its forms:
John Quincy Public, John Q. Public, John Public, J. Q. Public,
Johnny P., J.Q.P., J.Q., and even "J.P. loves S.A." carved on a
tree. Explore every possibility for any inadvertent gaffs.
Picture your chosen name as it will appear in various real life
situations: how will it look on a school register ? on a diploma
? on a resum