How To Improve Communications With Those Who Were Difficult To
Communicate With In the Past And How
You talked but didn't get a response. You talked but you got a
negative response. Has this happened to you often? All the time?
Occasionally? Never? Well if you have experienced it more often
then you care to admit then maybe it's time to find out why.
Good communications can be a pleasant experience. Bad
communications can be a very unpleasant experience. When you are
in conversation with someone else it's great to be able to "hit
it off" with them. On the other hand if you get the "cold
shoulder" from them or a stern rebuttal it might be your last
chance to communicate with them again.
When this happens with a family member, dear friend or even a
new acquaintness you may have "blown you chance" to ever enjoy
their company again. Now, hopefully, this won't be quite this
severe but you may have to "mend a lot of fences" before you
have can enjoy their company once again.
What are some things that causes these kind of responses? To be
blunt about the whole issue, you could be a "real blabber
mouth". You could be one that dominates the conversation from
the start. Instead of first asking questions of the individual
and then listening to their response you may just jump in there
with both feet and talk a mile a minute about your own interest.
Wow! was I guilty of that myself at one time. It was back during
my sales career that a certain instant happened to finally wake
me up to what I was doing wrong Let me first say, before I tell
you my story, that I was a very aggressive salesman who wanted
to be highly successful at my craft.
This particular incident happened one day when I was a sales
supervisor whose job was to open up new territories for my
company and then hire a salesman to finally manage it. My
company had a new and unique way of selling their product and
services and I was very excited about it.
So here I was in a distant city this day calling on a certain
apartment community to sell maintenance supplies. My goal was
always to make as many calls as I could in one day and add as
many new customers as I could sign up. Once I arrived on the
complex I spotted a man who I assumed was the maintenance
supervisor hurrying down the sidewalk. I called out to him and
he stopped.
Now here is the climax to this incident that day. I asked him if
he was the maintenance man and he agreed he was. I then
introduced myself and proceeded to make my lenghty presentation
pointing out all the benefits of my services and products. When
I finally finished the prospect looked at me with a very stern
look on his face and said, " I don't have the authority to buy
you'll have to talk to the manager" I said, "Why didn't you tell
me that before I began my presentation. He said," mister you
talked so fast I couldn't get a word in at all.
Another sad part of this story was I was breaking in a new
salesman. Not a very good lesson for someone just starting out
with the company. In addition to that, I finally went to the
manager to make my pitch to her without success. Even though I
asked her questions before I started talking she wasn't a bit
interested in changing vendors.
Since I'm a very positive thinking person, I didn't let that
incident discourage me. In retrospect it probably was the best
thing to happen. I learned a valuable lesson and so did the new
salesman as well. After that I learned to first ask questions
and then listen intensely to the response I get. Consequently my
closing rate became much more successful.
If you have lost contact with a family member, a good friend or
have had difficulty making new friends because of poor
communication skills I hope the above story will help you solve
your situation.
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