Calling Forth a Soulmate
How do I draw a soulmate into my life? You don't. I've read
plenty of books that tell you how to do it, but I don't believe
for a minute that you can place your cosmic order and your
perfect ideal twin soul is going to materialize just like that
at your front door. It doesn't happen like that. You can open
your heart and mind to finding a beautiful loving relationship,
but chances are that using the word soulmate will almost jinx
you from finding it. Why?
For many of us, when we think of a soulmate, we think of someone
perfect. Someone who is gorgeous, brilliant, funny, naturally
happy and kind. We think of someone who wants exactly the same
things out of life that we want. We picture a meeting right out
of the movies where both parties meet on the street and
instantly fall madly head over heels in love. We think that
there will never be any conflict beyond a quaint debate over
what colors to paint the baby's nursery. We imagine lovemaking
that is so phenomenally perfect the first time that one cries
from the sheer artistic beauty and telepathic oneness. All
problems and challenges in our lives will suddenly melt away
into faint memories because our soulmate has arrived and their
presence alone is so cosmic and amazing that all else pales in
comparison.
Yeah, and if I say my affirmations with enough conviction, gold
coins are going to start growing instead of dandelions in my
yard too! Wake up! If you're dreaming of that kind of a
soulmate, then you need to rent some good movies and call it
good. Love doesn't go like that and you know better. Look at it
this way.... You are the other half of that equation. Let's be
serious. If you are someone's soulmate, and they find you. Are
you capable of being that incredibly flawless and perfect for
them? No of course not. Nor are they. Soulmates are as mixed up
and weird as you are. They may have the same flaws as you do or
completely different ones. If you are holding out for that
fantasy, then you are playing a psychological game with
yourself. You have created an impossible dream to hide behind so
that you don't have to really risk falling in love with a real
live human being, warts and all.
Yes, I do believe that there are extremely rare cases where one
'feels' or 'knows' there is a certain person they are meant to
find and they are haunted by the need to find that one person.
They are doomed to hunt for that needle in a hay stack. But
let's get serious, that isn't the norm. We have all heard so
much about soulmates that we just think it would be really cool.
Well it's not. It sucks to spend a lifetime passing up real love
with real people because somewhere out there is this voice
calling your name. You doubt your sanity and spend most of your
life lonely and searching. Don't do it. Find real love with real
people.
Change your definition of soulmate. Call to yourself someone who
is open and real. Call to yourself someone who is genuine and
capable of love on a real everyday level in a real everyday
world where people get up and go to work and pay bills. Call to
yourself someone who knows how to show and express their love
without manipulation and head games. Call forth a forever kind
of love. Call forth a best friend that you can sit with in your
rocking chair on the front porch when you're too old to make
love anymore. Call someone who loves you enough to kick you in
the butt when you're screwing up. Call forth someone who will
shout from the rooftop when you are deserving of praise too.
Call forth someone who is a loyal and faithful lover willing to
learn and grow with you behind closed doors. Leave the rest to
fate. Don't define them. Don't imagine the look of their face or
the color of their eyes. Don't predetermine anything else about
them. Let them be exactly who they are and you be who you are.
Then work on making yourself into the same type of person that I
just described so that you'll be worthy of them when they show
up.
When you go through your ceremonies, affirmations, and prayers
for your soulmate, ask the heavens to help you to be open minded
and to not judge what that person is supposed to be. Ask for a
feeling of their essence so that you'll recognize it when you
see them for real. How does it feel to be with them? If you had
a perfect ideal partner, you wouldn't be able to relax and be
yourself because they were not of the same energy as you. Raise
your own self to be your best and ask for a partner that matches
your level of development so that you can grow together. You
don't want to have a partner who is in every way superior to you
because they're perfect and you're only human do you?
Unless you can lighten up your definition of what a soulmate is,
then you really shouldn't use the term. It will only bring you
loneliness and heartache if you insist on waiting for
perfection. The best advise I can give you if you want an
amazing forever kind of love is to be healthy, happy, and
independent. Quit worrying about when love will find you and get
busy with living your life. Keep your heart open and your eyes
open for the possible love of a lifetime, but don't obsess over
it. What is meant to be will be whether you call it to you or
not. Call for help being a beautiful soul. Trust that the rest
will fall into place in it's own perfect time.
Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge