Survivor of Abuse
Women all over the world experience physical and emotional pain
from their abusers. So alone and afraid to tell anyone what is
happening. Each time it happens, the numbness is stronger.
Emotionally drained--you can't feel the physical pain anymore.
Degraded and feeling inadequate you go on. Afraid to
leave--afraid of being followed and stalked--afraid you will be
destroyed completely. Feeling you will always be in this abusive
situation--there is no way out--you want to call it quits for
good.
Based on my own personal experiences of abuse, I know what it's
like to be a victim of abuse. I felt at one point I couldn't go
on. I felt alone and that there was no other way out but to end
it all. I had no fight left and gave up. Luckily I did succeed
in trying to take my own life. I now was more determined to
fight back. How dare he do this to me and get away with it. It
was frightening to think of leaving all alone but not as
frightening as being abused. I had no self esteem. I felt
inadequate and ugly. I was numb. I knew I had to get away before
he destroyed any chance I had of living a normal life and a
chance of happiness. I made the decision to stand and not be
knocked down anymore.
If you are an abused victim, be strong and fight back. There are
help hot lines, shelters for battered woman, and help from your
local law enforcement agency. Call family or friends. Tell them
about your abuser. There are websites to visit to help you
understand your feelings and regain your confidence. You don't
have to do this alone.
Plan ahead before you make your move. Have friends or
family have personal belongings waiting for you after you leave
your abuser. Have maps, phone numbers, and or
directions in tack to safe homes before leaving. You may want to
leave that information with someone whom you trust and retrieve
it after leaving. Don't leave while your abuser is
there--wait until he is gone. Don't give him any
indication that you plan to leave. Play along to keep him calm.
Have a law officer to go with you or come to the home
incase he should return while you are leaving. If you
have to leave your belongings behind in order to be safe, do it.
It can all be replaced but your life can't. If you have
no family or friends to stay with, find a safe home.
Don't give out your location or phone number to anyone unless
you are certain that they can be trusted. Always have
some one with you when you go out. Get help from
counseling--don't try to face this alone.
I got my life back now but for years I still had nightmares of
the abuse. Eventually the nightmares disappeared. All the years
of my life wasted because I let it happen to me. The longer you
stay in an abusive situation, the harder it becomes to leave and
the more pulled down you become. I have accomplished so much now
that I am no longer in an abusive situation. I have my self
esteem and confidence back. I feel as though I can conquer the
world. It's a good feeling.
Phyllis Benton, Living Nightmares of Abuse. Autobiography. An
inspirational and emotional story of abuse. Survivor of
emotional, sexual, and physical abuse. Book will be available
when released through publishamerica and other on line book
stores. ISBN # 1-4137-9156-5. http://www.pdbenton.org
http://www.freewebs.com/dianesfantasy/
abuse, victim, survivor, nightmares, emotional, sexual,
physical, autobiography, inspirational, education, confidence,
self esteem