Love Mysteries and Holiday Magic
It's the holidays, a time that reminds you that another year has
passed and you're still single- and dateless. Or may be you are
in a relationship that has run out of gas a long time ago and
you are wondering how you will handle your romantic plans- or
whether to even make any.
If the above sounds familiar, it may be time for some quiet
reflection that allows you to really think about what this time
means to you and how you want to celebrate it.
My people have a very interesting concept rooted in the cycles
of life. In this ancient teaching, we are told that to fully
celebrate life and feel alive, we must approach life with all
our "three faces" together: the face of our childhood, the face
of our youth and the face of our adulthood. Our three faces keep
us alive and energized, once we lose the ability to carry all
these three faces together we live a life of the living dead.
Holiday wonder and magic
Our child face is that part of us that sees wonder and magic all
around us. It is the part of us that is joyful, playful,
intuitive, dreams and desires -there are no limits, anything is
possible. Our child face is open to possibilities and to
outcomes and expands our being.
The holidays can be a wonderful time to think about what your
wants and desires are. Let yourself go and just dream. What if
you could just have what you wanted and wished for? What would
your life look like, feel like? How would you make that person
feel intensely loved, appreciated and supported? How exciting
and fulfilled would your life be? Raise your expectations.
Believe that you deserve the best. Armed with your dream and
vision keep your heart and mind open to a partner who holds
similar dreams and vision of life.
Holiday passion and desire
The face of our youth is that part of us that is lives with fire
of passion and desire to express who we are. It's that part of
us that holds our sensuality, passion, spontaneity,
unpredictability and vitality. It is the part of us that is
highly energized, creative, motivated and inspired.
The holidays can be a great time to tap into our youthful
energy. Take advantage of people's "let's have some fun" mindset
and do what feels right for you.
1. Accept invitations that come your way, even if it means going
solo. You might just have a good time and won't know unless you
go
2. Start a new tradition, something that befits your single
life. If you've recently become single, there is no gain in
longing for what once was, but rather much joy in exploring what
is and what can be. Get together with your single friends, ask
them to bring along one or two platonic friends, relatives or
co-workers of the opposite sex. Add spice to the party with some
interesting "get-to-know" games. Conversation will flow and you
just never know who showed up right at your own doorstep.
3. Do something outside yourself--something for someone else.
There is something so attractive and luring about somebody doing
something for say a lonely senior, homeless or disadvantaged
child. Not only are you helping the less fortunate, you might
just meet him/her doing exactly the same thing.
Holiday insight and wisdom
Our adulthood or elder's face, inner voice, inner mentor,
realized self or as we say in Swahili "mzee" is the part of us
that is strong and wise and comes with age and insight. It is
that part of us that encompass the concerns of a larger
worldview, is meditative, reflective and is a source of courage.
It is the knowing part of us simply waiting to be listened to
and guide us to people and situations where love connections may
be made.
The holidays can be a great opportunity to reflect on how far
you've come, where you are now on your quest for your soul mate,
and what you need to do to allow love to find you. Take time to
work on yourself, and all facets of your life. Lose a few pounds
if you need to, clean your apartment, attend a self-empowerment
seminar, spend more time in meditation, connect with family and
friends you haven't had the time during the year to talk to or
meet. The more you expand yourself, the more potential partners
you will meet who mirror you in every facet of life and bring
you closer to your soul mate.
As the year ends and a new one begins, take action and use the
energy of your youth face to move past your comfort zone. Don't
let the new year slip into spring without taking advantage of
all the fun ways available all around you to meet compatible
singles. Rather than being focused on "this is how a
relationship SHOULD look like", bring forward your child face
which says "I wonder what we will create together". Sometimes it
takes the eyes of a child to emerge from our narrow-mindedness
and limitations to embrace the magical person right infront of
our nose.
Tap into your elder's face to truly understand what intimate
relationships are all about and stay focused on what matters
most to you and your future. If you find a person who shares
your dreams, has the same attitude, passion and vision about
life and is as concerned about your happiness and your pursuit
of your life's dreams, as he/she is about his/her own, chances
are you have found your soul mate.
This is a time of new beginnings, everything feels promising and
full of hope. Make a conscious commitment to be conscious, aware
and alive. Enjoy the sensuality of the moment. Do not obsess on
what should have, could have, might have instead focus on what
is NOW. Each person, encounter and each relationship is unique.
Allow yourself to consciously explore each person and each
relationship.
And just a little bit more doze of African ancient wisdom,
always remember:
1. When it begins, it is the right time
2. Whoever shows up, is exactly the right person
3. Whatever happens, it is the only thing that could have
happened
4. When it's over, it's OVER.
Just imagine what 2006 could bring to your life and where you
could be in one year.... Let 2006 be the year you find the right
partner and create the relationship of your dreams.